Labor Day

I’m not one who expresses any sort of emotion towards any holiday unless it's Memorial Day but that's only because it falls on the same weekend as my birthday. But I decided to do this blog post on Labor Day strictly because I personally welcome Fall with open arms. To me, Labor Day signifies the end of boob sweat and the beginning of fur season. What’s not to love about that? Here are my Do’s and Don’ts for your weekend.

Don’t: Celebrate Labor Day at all. It’s so…American/pedestrian.

Do: wear all black. 

Don’t: Go to The river. It’s going to be a crowded nightmare and the thought of you being part of that mess gives me anxiety. 

Do: be somewhat festive by searching Labor Day on netflix and watching whatever comes up.

Don’t:  Forget to apply sunscreen. Wrinkles and looking like tan mom is never ok.

Don’t: open any of the story's on snapchat. Too dark.

Do: Remember that when you drink anything besides skinny margaritas you're trying to get obese.

Do: watch Kim's wedding strictly for Kanyes appearance. 

Don’t: watch rich kids of Beverly Hills. 

Do: go back and watch rich kids of Beverly Hills for a minute only to check if the blonde chick got a nose job and then continue with anything else that's on tv.

Do: Gather up all your crop tops and have a bonfire in your backyard.

Do: Throw any and all memories of any summer fling into that bonfire Now.

Guide to looking 20 and not 82..

A few weeks ago I ran into someone who I went to high school with, she was on crack, I don't know where you get crack 
at, living in the suburbs but she managed to find a way, Clearly her skin journey and herself were both not in a great place either which got me thinking is 23 really the year where we just let ourselves go? Are fine lines and wrinkles literally right around the damn corner? And are we all just destined to transform and have our bodys shaped just like our mothers? Which wouldn't be that dark In my case, but for others I pray for.

With all that said It’s time to get real with ourselves. Look in the mirror right now and tell yourself that you’re tired of never being carded when you go out, even though your personality is a vibrant and youthful 20 something, the wrinkles on your forehead are saying 52. Take a deep cleansing yoga breath and tell yourself you’re ready to get serious. I know  its exhausting,  I really hate confrontation too, especially with myself... 

Steps to getting serious.

1. Night cream

This gem will take care of any oiliness, fine lines, or pores that hopefully you didn’t even have in the first place.  Now you can safely walk around outside without looking 90.

2. alcohol bloat is a real thing

Sure ordering 10 Long Island iced teas, 5 margaritas (not skinny girl), and then finishing it off with a Mudslide from tgi Fridays happy hour  is all fun and stuff but when I see people doing this on a weekly basis, I'm concerned. 

3. Shopping at dress barn

Stop. Just stop. Were in our 20s not 41.

& I'm done...

Namaste<3

****** the pictures with the dress barn girls are real people off Instagram, not models. I really hope they read this.